


It’s Hard to Say it, Time to Say it

by CaptainAwesome242



Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Advice, Captain Terrell, Conversations, Enterprise, Father-Son Relationship, Five Year Mission, Gen, Goodbyes, In Memory of Anton Yelchin, Post-Star Trek Beyond, Promotion, Star Trek Beyond, Star Trek Beyond Spoilers, Starship Enterprise (Star Trek), Talking, USS Reliant, Yorktown
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-01
Updated: 2016-09-01
Packaged: 2018-08-12 09:12:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,217
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7929085
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CaptainAwesome242/pseuds/CaptainAwesome242
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Pavel has a big decision to make, and goes to Jim for advice.</p>
            </blockquote>





	It’s Hard to Say it, Time to Say it

Pavel was not going to lie, he was nervous.

He was currently stood outside the door of Jim’s temporary living quarters aboard the Yorktown trying to psych himself up for the conversation he’d come here to have. He wasn’t scared of his Captain, and he wasn’t even in trouble, but he needed some advice and he wasn’t sure how Jim was going to react.

A few days after Krall had been defeated and the aftermath was being taken care of, Pavel had received a personal transmission from the USS Reliant. Captain Terrell himself had offered Pavel the position of First Officer. Pavel, for his part, had been surprised, flattered and terrified all at once. He’d thanked the Captain for his incredible offer, but had requested some time to think about his choice. Captain Terrell had understood, but had told him the decision needed to be made sooner rather than later and had given him a week to make his choice.

As he pushed the buzzer he felt his heart hammer in his chest. _He was not nervous, he was not nervous_.

The door slid open to reveal Jim dressed casually in a plain t-shirt and a pair of jogging pants, though Pavel guessed that he was only relaxing and not exercising. It had now been a week and a half since Krall had attacked, and while the bruises were fading and everyone was recovering, this was most definitely a time to rest and recuperate. Pavel hated that he was interrupting Jim’s time in this way, but he really needed his advice and he had to give Terrell his answer in the next few days.

He’d wanted to ask him sooner but Jim had been extremely busy, as they all had, with the clean up and recovery of the Yorktown base and there hadn’t been a moment to ask. The only time Pavel had seen Jim in any kind of casual capacity had been at his surprise birthday party, and it wouldn’t have been fair to ask him then. He didn’t _really_ want to ask him now, but he was running out of time and he needed to discuss this with his Captain.

When Jim saw who it was his face lit up with a grin.

“Pavel! Come in!” He stepped aside to let the younger man in.

“Zhank you, Keptin,” Pavel said.

Jim waved his hand, “It’s Jim, we’re off duty, and come to think of it we don’t even have a ship at the moment so we’ll both be off duty for a while,”

Pavel cringed, “Vell actually, Kep—Jim, I’m not so sure about zat,”

Jim frowned, and gestured for Pavel to take a seat on the couch as he sat in the opposite armchair.

“What do you mean?”

Pavel took a deep breath and decided to just get straight to the point.

“Vell, I received a message from Keptin Terrell from ze Reliant: he vants me to become his First Officer,”

Jim was silent for a moment, before he smiled, “Congratulations, Pavel. Are you going to take it?”

“I don’t know. I sink eet vill be an incredible opportunity, but I haff a life and a... a family aboard ze Enterprise. I can’t just abandon zat,”

Jim looked thoughtful, “The way I see it, you are a valuable crewmember to me as your Captain and to me as your friend,”

Pavel nodded sadly, Jim was going to ask him to stay. _Which wouldn’t be a bad thing_ , part of him thought. Or would it? He’ll have missed out on this opportunity. Oh, he was so confused!

“And as such,” Jim continued, “I want what will be the best for you, and if that is serving aboard another ship then so be it,”

Pavel looked up in confusion, “Keptin?”

“Jim,” the older man corrected gently, “Pavel, opportunities like this don’t come around every day and you have to decide whether it’s what you want or not. We are your family, Pavel, and we’ll miss you like hell, but if this is what you want then we are behind you all the way,”

Pavel took a deep breath, ignoring the prickling behind his eyes, “I vill miss all of you too, my time aboard ze Enterprise has been ze best time of my life and I vouldn’t change any of eet for ze vorld. But vhat eef I go and I’m no good at being a First Officer, I’ll just let ewerybody down,”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa! Who said anything about letting anyone down? The thing is Pavel, you never know what you’re gonna be good or bad at until you do it. Do you honestly think I thought I’d make a good Captain? I only did what I thought I had to to save us all, I never dreamed they’d let me keep the Enterprise afterwards. I thought they were nuts! I was glad, but I didn’t think it would last. I knew I’d screw up somehow but here I am years later with an amazing ship in construction, an amazing crew, and a whole new outlook on life and my position. The point I’m trying to make is that even if you have a few rough days getting used to it, you’ll get there eventually and you’ll make it your own. And for what it’s worth, I think you’ll make a great First Officer, and nothing you could do will ever let us down,”

Pavel felt a tear roll down his cheek, “Do you really sink so?”

Jim smiled, “I know so, and I don’t just speak for myself, that goes for the rest of the crew too,”

Pavel sat quietly in though, before looking up to the man he respected the most, “Vhat should I do?”

“I can’t answer that for you, you have to decide for yourself. But I just want you to know that nothing is permanent. If you get to the Reliant and find it’s not for you, which I doubt will happen but anyway, you will always be welcome back aboard any ship of mine. And just because we’ll be aboard different ships doesn’t mean we won’t talk, we’ll still be here for you to support you and to keep you up to date with all the craziness that goes on aboard the Enterprise. Don’t hold yourself back because of us,”

Pavel nodded thoughtfully, wiping the dampness from his cheeks. This was the toughest decision of his life, but having spoken to Jim he felt like he was closer to making his choice.

“Zhank you for your adwice, Jim. Eet vas wery helpful,”

Jim smiled, “No problem, have you made up your mind?”

Pavel shook his head, “No, not yet, but you haff given me some important sings to consider,”

“I’m glad. If you need anything else, don’t hesitate to ask,”

They stood and walked to the door.

“Zhank you, I vill,”

When Pavel returned to his own quarters, he sat in thought for another two hours before he put the call through to the Reliant.

Captain Terrell’s face came into focus on the screen, and he smiled when he recognized Pavel.

“Ah, Mr Chekov. How are you?”

“I am vell sir, zhank you, how are you?”

“I’m good, thank you. Have you made your choice?”

Pavel nodded.

“I accept.”

**Author's Note:**

> This fic is basically what I want to happen between Beyond and the next film. I don't want them to kill Chekov off but I also don't want them to gloss over his absence. In the original movies he WAS First Officer aboard the Reliant under Captain Terrell so it would be a nice link to the past as well as a fond farewell to both Chekov and Anton. Writing this was also my way of paying tribute to Anton. The title, "It’s Hard to Say it, Time to Say it," comes from the Nickelback song ‘Photograph’, the full lyric is, "It’s hard to say it, time to say it, goodbye, goodbye,"


End file.
